Walking with God while Single
Hello Dear friends,
It’s me again. I am always so thankful that God has given me the chance to blog again after taking a break of nearly seven years. The truth is, God had to change my heart. He led me back to blogging—not just because He was telling me to, but because even if just one person reads this and is blessed, that is more than enough reward. With that in mind, I’m very excited to finally write about singleness or walking with God in your singleness. Now, before the single people reading this roll their eyes—I’m asking you to hear me out. I got saved in May 2012, and shortly after that, the Lord gave me a deep desire to be married. I had no idea it would take 11 years to meet the love of my life. The lessons I learned during those years are ones I will never forget.
I eventually had to learn to keep walking with God whether I'd get married or not. I learned how to run to the Lord when I received a “no” from Him over someone I thought was “the one or a yes.”
I learned to trust the Lord’s opinion about my potential spouse more than my own. There are so many directions I could take this blog, but for now I want to share a few things I learned during 11 years of walking with the Lord as a single person who deeply desires marriage. My prayer is that they bless you.
Know God — and fall deeper in love with Him and his word every day
I want to say this humbly and with sensitivity: the Lord has no problem with your desire to be married. He has no issue with us wanting companionship, having dreams, wanting to travel, having goals, desiring friendships and so on. However, no matter what we love, who we marry, or whether our desires are fulfilled; nothing compares to our relationship, intimacy, and deeply knowing of God. Jesus is not only our salvation for our eternal souls—He is our salvation for everyday life. Jesus said in John 14:6:
“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
We need God for everyday living. He is the light of the world and he is the one we follow. It means that without Jesus we are in darkness, we do not know where we are going. he is direction for our lives and hearts. As Christians, we are here for God. We are alive for Him. He created us to know Him deeply and passionately. The Bible refers to Jesus as the Bridegroom, and we are the bride. Our value and satisfaction must come from God first, because we were created for Him. Everything else follows. Jesus is so loving and generous that He gives us other things to enjoy like a spouse—but those things were always meant to flow from Him. Our relationship with Him is meant to water, fuel, and sustain everything else in our lives.
What does this look like in singleness?
It looks like praying and spending intentional time with God. It looks like surrendering our desires daily—especially the ones that haven’t been met yet like meeting the right person he has for us. It looks like filling ourselves with the Word of God so our spirit can be satisfied. When our spirit is strong, we can weather disappointment and wait in a healthier way when we are sustained in God’s presence, his love and word. It also looks like being honest with the Lord about your desire to be married. Talking to Him about it. Asking Him to show you who He wants for you and what He wants for you.
Asking Him to place your future spouse—the one He has for you—in your heart so when they come you are ready to receive them.
This is where you and the Lord can dream together. This is where waiting doesn’t have to be painful or lonely. This is where walking through singleness with God changes everything. Meditating on Scripture reminds us that we are loved, chosen, seen, never alone, and that God is faithful and reminds us of what matters. Scriptures like:
Ephesians 1:4 – “For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.”
John 15:16 – “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit…”
Ephesians 2:4–5 – “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us…”
I know many people reading this have heard some of this before. And sometimes, encouragement about being “content with the Lord” can sound like having a desire for marriage is wrong or suggesting that the reader or listener is not content. But that isn’t true at all. Falling deeper in love with Jesus is not a dismissal of our desires—it’s a lifeline and a privilege. It is there that you will select a spouse that shares that love for lord as well. Everyone needs intimacy with God. Single and married people need him. Young people need him. Elderly people need him. Pastors and leaders need him. Regular churchgoers need it and so on. We all need Jesus.
The truth about satisfaction
Jesus is life. He is salvation. He is our refuge and he is supposed to be our best friend—but He is also Lord. That means He has authority and perspective over every area of our lives. Marriage won’t make us more satisfied. Children won’t make us more satisfied. Holidays won’t make us more satisfied—although all of these things can bring joy. True satisfaction comes because we are already satisfied in Him. This is a game-changer. This is why I am writing today - to remind you that if you are already loving Jesus with your whole heart - how amazing but if you are struggling to be satisfied with him because you long for a spouse then let this blog be of encouragement to you.
Hebrews 5:9 calls Jesus the author of salvation: “And having been made perfect… He became the source of eternal salvation to all who obey Him.” Jesus is the prize. He is not someone we come to just to get what we want and then move on or stop following him because he hasn't made our dreams come true - no he is the dream fulfilled, he is the destination.
We come to Him because we need Him—His eternal life, His salvation, His love. And He desires our love too.We come to Him because we need Him—His eternal life, His salvation, His love. And He desires our love too.
Why walking with God in singleness matters
This season is an opportunity to develop deep roots so we don’t try to get our worth from a boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse—but from Jesus. Walking with God in singleness gives us confidence and courage. It helps us serve the Lord wholeheartedly, move forward in our calling, and live fulfilled lives. It doesn’t mean we don’t have desires—it means we allow the Lord to lead us. With His help, we can resist temptation, obey Him, and overcome setbacks.
Some benefits of walking closely with God in singleness:
You trust God with your singleness
You trust Him with who your future spouse will be
You learn the Lord’s desires concerning your future
You grow in your calling
You practice obedience
You submit your sexuality to God and align with His truth
You become the kind of person you are praying for
Singleness isn’t a time to pause—it’s a time to walk with the Lord. Do what He asks you to do, and along the way, your spouse may be walking right beside you as you walk with God. Walking with God doesn’t stop in any season—it grows through youth, singleness, marriage, and even if some of our readers have gone through a divorce.
A final encouragement
God gave you the desire for marriage. He knows what is best for you. He desires someone whose heart is for Him. Singleness can be hard. Waiting can be hard. Temptation can come.
But knowing God deeply helps us stay steady and not lose heart. Waiting 11 years was not easy for me—but I am so thankful the Lord helped me not to quit and not to settle. I truly believe this: I could not have met my husband in my own wisdom, strength or plans. Josh was pursuing the Lord, and I was pursuing the Lord—and suddenly, we met and we knew the Lord was bringing us together. This doesn’t mean we love God to get a spouse. It means God knows our desires, and His choices are always better. This is not a season to settle. Not to grow weary and choose someone who is not God’s best. God is working on you—and He is also working on your future spouse. He is healing hearts, building wisdom in you both, and preparing both of you for the appointed time.
There is always so much more I could write, but I’ll stop here for now. My prayer is that this encourages you in whatever season you’re in. Your single season is a beautiful time to grow deeper in the Lord and to walk in your calling, and to trust that He will give you what you need. I don’t know when your spouse will come, and I can’t guarantee anything—but I am hopeful for you, friend. And I pray the Lord fulfills the desires of your heart and in the meantime, know that God loves you and he is with you in this season.
Love Sarah
